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Home > Jokes > Computer Jokes > The Customer and the Unix Consultant

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Rated: 10.00/10 | Votes: 1 | Views: 24 |Submitted: 10/14/2006


The Customer and the Unix Consultant

Cust: what is the command that will tell me the revision code of a program ?

UNIX: yes, that's correct.

Cust: no, what is it ?

UNIX: yes.

Cust: so, which is the one ?

UNIX: no.'which' is used to find the program.

Cust: stop this. who are you ?

UNIX: use 'who am i' not 'who r yoo'.you can also 'finger yoo' to get information about 'yoo'.

Cust: all i want to know is what finds the revision code ?

UNIX: use 'what'.

Cust: that's what i am trying to find out. isn't that true ?

UNIX: no. 'true' gives you 0.

Cust: which one ?

UNIX: 'true' gives you 0. 'which programname'

Cust: let's get back to my problem. what program? how do i find it?

UNIX: type 'find/-name it' to find 'it'.type 'what program' to get the revision code.

Cust: i want to find the revision code.

UNIX: you can't 'find revisioncode', you must use 'what program'.

Cust: which command will do what i need?

UNIX: no. 'which command' will find 'command'.

Cust: i think i understand. let me write that.

UNIX: you can 'write that' only if 'that' is a user on your system.

Cust: write what?

UNIX: no. 'write that'.'what program'.

Cust: cut that out!

UNIX: yes. those are valid files for 'cut'.don't forget the options.

Cust: do you always do this ?

UNIX: 'du' will give you disk usage.

Cust: HELP!

UNIX: 'help' is only used for Source Code Control System(SCCS).

Cust: you make me angry.

UNIX: no, I don't 'make me' angry but i did 'make programname' when i was upset once.

Cust: i don't want to make trouble, so no more.

UNIX: no 'more'? 'which' will help you find 'more'. every system has 'more'.

Cust: nice help! I'm confused more now.

UNIX: understand that since 'help' is such a small program, it is better not to 'nice help'. and 'more now' is not allowed but 'at now' is. Unless of course 'now' is a file name.

Cust: this is almost as confusing as my PC.

UNIX: i didn't know you needed help with 'pc'.let me get you to the Pascal compiler team.


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