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Home > Jokes > Lists Jokes > Personal Mottos

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Rated: 1.00/10 | Votes: 1 | Views: 305 |Submitted: 12/01/2005


Personal Mottos

A hard-on doesn't count as personal growth.



Do I look like a fucking people person?



This isn't an office. It's Hell with fluorescent lighting.



I started out with nothing...and I still have most of it left.



I pretend to work. They pretend to pay me.



If I throw a stick, will you leave?



And just how may I fuck you over today?



And your crybaby whiny-assed opinion would be...?



I'm just working here till a good fast-food job opens up.



I'm not your type. I'm not inflatable.



I'm trying to imagine you with a personality.



One of us is thinking about sex...

OK, it's me.



I have a computer, a vibrator, & pizza delivery. Why should I leave the house?



I just want revenge. Is that so wrong?



It's sick the way you people keep having sex without me.



I work 40 hours a week to be this poor.



Okay, okay, I take it back! UnFuck you!



Nice perfume. Must you marinate in it?



You look like shit. Is that the style now?



Earth is full. Go home.



I thought I wanted a career, turns out all I wanted was paychecks.



It ain't the size, it's... no, it's the size.



I majored in liberal arts. Will that be for here or to go?


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